oh deer…

We live in a rural area.  Lots of wildlife and an overgrown “yard” (unfenced property) that we pass off has having a “natural” (unkempt) look. 

Well, the circle-of-life is encroaching a little closer than I would like.  Someone (coyotes? bobcat? mountain lion?) killed a deer in our driveway and ate half of it.  Very rude.  What is left is mainly a large, gaping (empty!) ribcage.  I just threw up in my mouth thinking about it.

While this generally really bums me out (poor deer), the distressing part is more practical. 

What the hell do we do about it??

I don’t want our (or our neighbors’) dogs getting near it.  I don’t want other predators coming around for a nosh. 

Animal control won’t come get it because it’s technically on private property (despite an easement for the county park to service the trails).  The pest control company I called put me on hold for several loooonng minutes (when I imagine they were contemplating the grotesqueness of this job) and then told me they don’t “come up into the mountains,” like we’re in the Andes or something.

I’m at a loss.  Scott says he’ll drag it down to the road (~1/4 mile) if necessary, something that I can’t even contemplate without a grimace. 

I can’t even run out there to take a picture of it.  Not even from a “safe” distance with a telephoto lens.  Too scared.  (Of what, I’m not exactly sure.  My gag reflex maybe?)  It is official that I could never be a photojournalist in a war zone or a crime scene.  Too squeamish.  I digress…

Now need to brainstorm ideas of carcass removal.  Pretty sure it’s too big to fit into our composter…

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4 Responses to oh deer…

  1. post-script:
    at 3:30am Martha barfed up what looked like a piece of deer spine.

    post-post-script:
    can you put a dead deer in your garbage can for pick up? Scott thinks yes.

  2. Margie Mader-Clark says:

    ummm…wood chipper?

  3. Scottd says:

    Machete, plastic bags, garbage can, DONE. I knew watching all those episodes of Sopranos would pay off someday.

  4. Lisa Clark says:

    In addition to the machete and hefty bag…Christi standing in the driveway singing Elton John’s “Circle of Life” would have been magnificent.

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