the unmistakeable sound

I think many pet-owners and moms possess near-bionic hearing. (I am excluding dads since my sample size of one suggests otherwise – sorry, Scott.)  I can hear anyone vomiting anywhere in my house, at any time of day, no exceptions.

Deep REM sleep is no match for my innate sense that someone is ready to hurl their dinner or a hairball onto a surface not suitable for such matter.  The mild beginnings of retching and wheezing by a furry beast in my house are enough for me to bolt from any reverie and lunge from my bed, knowing the sooner I clean it up, the less likely it is to stain (though really, why do I bother?).

The nuances of this radar weren’t needed last night when Oliver threw up on our bed, right in between our pillows.  I think my heart rate was already over 100 running back to the bedroom with something to clean it up before Scott even knew what was going on…

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5 Responses to the unmistakeable sound

  1. Erica says:

    Haha! Moms DO have the super-senses!
    My friend Lisa shares your acute hearing– she can hear diaper velcro being unfastened through two closed doors at three o’clock in the morning.
    I can smell a poopy-diapered child, upstairs asleep in his room, door closed, when I am in the garage. No foolin’.

  2. Scott says:

    By the time I wake up to the sounds, you are usually there catching it with a Kleenex in your hands. I always have the same thought – “how does she get there so fast – does she sleep with a Kleenex in her hand”? I would have rolled in it for sure.

    Super barf-hearing is one of your many superpowers. 😉


  3. Susan says:

    Thought about you in the middle of the night last night when I heard the unmistakable sound of our cat puking. I am not as speedy as you though. 😦 Cat puke cleanup in the middle of the night is NO fun!

  4. Betty Lee says:

    Ignorance is bliss. Mac ignores the baby crying, I ignore the cat puking.

  5. Lisa Clark says:

    you know – on any other night, I can quickly and daintily hop out of bed and pee, get a drink of water, check the oven…whatever thought awoke me. Without fail; however, on the night of the predictive retching sounds, my feet tangle in my covers as I leap out, splatting on the floor, frantically stretching up for the door handle as I try to push Luna (a.k.a. “the retcher”) out…while she pauses just at the door sill to gack on the carpet before she leaves. Sigh…

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